Where has your confidence gone?

Laurelle through harp strings

All humans are born confident so why do most of us feel not good enough? The word ‘confidence’ comes from the Latin ‘to have faith’ so confidence really means believing in yourself. All babies are born confident but school, parents, friends, culture, the media and religion soon bury our innate confidence under layers of shoulds, oughts and must nots.

There are many different types of confidence and uncovering them is one of our life’s tasks. Physical confidence can be accessed through breathing. Unfortunately, most of us have forgotten how to breathe properly and push the breath up into our chests causing stress and a further lack of confidence. Correct breathing can transform the way we feel about ourselves and help to release confidence naturally.

Emotional confidence can be rediscovered when we learn to relate authentically to ourselves and others. Learning to use language mindfully in relationships, rather than criticising ourselves or others, allows confidence to shine through.

One of the best ways to discover mental confidence is to learn how to speak effectively in public. Public Speaking is the Western World’s number one fear and we are more scared of it than of dying. However, when we learn to speak in public we have to face our fears and, as a result, our confidence magically reappears.

Our unique confidence is a little different, however. Like teabags, we don’t find out how strong we are until we’re put in hot water. Sometimes we need that water to be boiling for our real flavour to be brought out. Many people have endured terrifying ordeals and still given the world a confident message. Anne Frank wrote about love and forgiveness while hiding from the Nazis. Nelson Mandela led his country in peace after being imprisoned for 26 years. Maya Angelou became a poet and internationally acclaimed speaker after being raped as a child and becoming mute for many years. Fortunately, our lives don’t have to be this dramatic but we do have to allow ourselves to be pared back to our real, glorious selves if we want our confidence to shine out.

So, go on, dare to be yourself and rediscover your confidence! If you need help, I will be running a series of five workshops called The Confidence Shift between this month, October, and July 2015 in which we will make the fascinating journey into the centre of ourselves. For more details, go to my website www.laurellerond.com.

Happy Autumn!

Love Laurelle x